When someone hurts you, the natural response is to fight back, lash out and hurt them like they hurt you. Some choose to retreat inward, holding onto pain and secretly self-shame behind a closed mouth. Then there’s also the personal punishment, in effort to somehow redeem yourself through some form of blame or sadly, humiliation and self-harm. From any other onlooker, these are relentless actions taken to shield ourselves from pain, rejections, disappointments and, so on. Maybe, even reading this now might make you feel repulsed at such drastic measures to safeguard some semblance of sanity but in one way or another, we all do it.
When you experience some level of hurt, intentionally or otherwise, it hits you at the core. Even the slightest thought of facing it head on can be so daunting, that numbing yourself seems more likely the better option. Pain can be so disruptive that we often forget the possible growth potentials and deeper healing opportunities holding at the ready. Other avenues like; letting go, acceptance, understanding, commitment, and most of all, love. Forgiveness is a fickle and multi-layered spiritual concept, it can easily be tossed around like a hot potato, “You have to forgive. "Forgiveness is key." "Forgive not for others sake but for your own.” The idea gets tossed around like it’s a simple thing to do and it’s not. It takes guts and drive to forgive and when you’re on track, it becomes a vehicle to view beyond what occurred and observe your potential for greatness.
“Forgiveness is admitting we are like other people.” That is to say, there's meaning behind it. That in order to understand another’s ill behavior or actions, you’ll need to take a good honest look at yourself under the same lens. When you can do that, it becomes the first step in allowing the experience of forgiveness to penetrate you. It is acknowledging that all wrongs, have rights and that correction, can start with you. It’s not an easy task and you may fall down many times but you’ll get back up just as much, in pain, through pain and beyond pain because the pain you feel, is your path to healing. Your fight will no longer be against yourself or what happened to you because it will become a standard of commitment to your growth. The beauty of forgiveness is it’s a spiritual quality that has to be discovered from within, as a full embrace and it will prove to be your greatest potential for growth, transformation, and true healing. Let forgiveness become an Evolution of Experience, your symbol of a soulful journey with a special gift and promise of a greater, whole self.
The Gifts of Forgiveness
* The Gifts of Forgiveness are many and here are just a few.
- Discovering an inner readiness and greater accessibility to the experience of open honesty.
- A sense of absorption in receiving the big picture and permeability, taking in what works and letting go or eliminating what does not.
- Gaining insight into the power and potency of surrender: starting fresh, cleaning and clearing the slate.
- Greater strength and determination in ceasing dysfunctional and ill-patterned thoughts, emotions and behaviors.
- Creating opportunities to craft inner spaces of radical acceptance and feeling a sense of freedom in that.
- Clarity around where you are now, what you want ahead, and who you want to be moving forward.
- Personal reward in time used wisely, in practicing new skills and behaviors to match.
- Please feel free to add to your own list and share!
It’s important to keep seeking the gifts of forgiveness because when you experience some form of rejection, it may take some time to find understanding and the growth potentials. It may take years and even when you think you have it all together, there seems to be more. However, there is (1) beautiful thing you can do toward forgiveness and that is to be kind to yourself. Every day, every moment, take the opportunity to be conscious when your pain rises and soothe it. You may not understand what happened and why, the intentions and behaviors behind it but you can validate what you feel in the moment you feel it. Be kind with your pain because it just wants to be heard. Be kind with yourself for having endured through it. Just simple be kind because this moment, right now, is all yours to create exactly what you want in kindness and in great love.
- Inner Beauty Blog
J. Circosta, 2.5.2020, All rights reserved.
In connection with All Faiths Seminary International, February spiritual blog, Forgiveness- The Evolution of Experience, ©2/1/2020.
All Faiths Seminary International: www.allfaithssemiary.org
- Copyright Disclaimer
** No part of this blog shall be used for publication in connection with any other types of media including but not limited to; books, magazines, internet publications and/or other websites without written request to the author, Jennifer Circosta. Only with written permission from the author, may any contents of this blog be published for public and/or personal use. Please note this blog is in connection with All Faiths Seminary International as part of their monthly newsletter and is the established entity with 1st rights pertaining therein. All Faiths Seminary International reserves the right to approve or deny the location of publication or form of media as listed above for this blog, Forgiveness- The Evolution of Experience, and pending approval also reserves the right to acknowledgement and inclusion of All Faiths website to be displayed with publication, example listed above.
TIS` THE SEASON OF HEART
December can be quite a magical month and fulfilling time of year. We get a chance to embrace the spirit of holidays and witness the wonder through the eyes of children and adults alike. Tis` the season of heart, when the world steps into a place of family, togetherness, and hope. It’s an end of a year that begins an active path into giving and receiving, rooted in a coming together of values and the essence of home. The season fills the atmosphere with magic; crisp air and snow falling from sky, lights aglow on streets and in homes, long gazes into loved one’s eyes by the crackles of fire and sparks of sweet-hearts. We take care, nestling into hearty foods like soups, stews, and hot chocolate. We bundle up with sweaters, scarves, blankets and loved ones and we find ourselves surround by light, the illumination of our hopes and dreams in the stillness of love within our hearts.
The heart symbolizes life, love and the engagement in partnership. The heart never leads alone... It never beats alone... One pulse follows the other in the direction of union. A sense of union requires partnership. We learn to connect and re-connect through the heart-experience, magnified between a pair of arms that allow us to reach out and touch what we love, while, cradled and comforted between two breasts that safely hold what we feel. We are given an opportunity to feel the magic of life, connection and harmony both, individually and collectively. The season of heart reminds us in order to create a spark of life, we cannot go at it alone. We simply relate and create in a blended continuum of wholeness. The heart does not beat alone... It does not lead alone... One pulse follows the other in complete unification.
This is a time of un-veiling, re-vealing, and an un-folding of self to the inner sweetness of comfort and warmth. It’s a reminder of the mother-child experience, the inner connection and bond of unconditional love. Our very own place to rest soulfully in the wonder and awe, completely disarmed and embraced in the natural state of being. The heart leads us to a clear passage and cleansing, a shedding of old, a point to nurture life and all that we live for. It is a space given in which to surrender, to lay down a clean slate, to be re-born in concept as we celebrate into the new, calm and cradled in the mother energy, inside the season of heart.
#HeartSeason #SpiritofCalm&Comfort #MotherEnergy #CradledInHeartEnergy #TistheSeasonforMagic #HeldinLight
It’s time to get out of the “cookie cutter” version of what healing should look like and shift back into our own personal guidance and experience. Sometimes, the path to healing has us feeling off center and it’s cause for questioning but we forget, feeling off center is also for good purpose. The center balances opposing sides and reveals a place of wholeness. When the scale tips toward into the wound, the other side of balance is overlooked. The gift of wholeness is to be open and available to both sides and to integrate them into conscious balance. Your personal path to healing begins inside wholeness not in one side of experience. Let’s look at pain for example. I’ve thought about pain. Pain is real. Pain is relentless. It reveals itself through the body, not just inside it. It wants to be seen. It beckons to be heard. It tugs at you every minute of every day. Pain is restrictive, trapped in the body with no space for joy and we suffer. Pain is suffering, the physical manifestation of held in, held back, shut down and buried emotion. Your physical body can become the storehouse for ignored, unacknowledged and suppressed emotional energy. Pain is an internal broadcast system for the feelings buried inside, screaming to be heard. To be acknowledged. To be cleared. To be loved.
Every healing journey will not look the same. It’s a personal pursuit-
Have you ever sat with the inner voice of your own pain?
I have. Pain is a lot more than just what we name it. It’s a culmination of stuck emotions, blocked feelings, experiences, memories, unconscious belief systems and unhealthy patterns. Because of this, healing can be an evolution of all experience and acknowledging what exists inside you, begins the path that serves as a direction. All of it is important information to construct a very intimate healing experience. Sometimes the tendency is to give up because you don’t like what you see and it can be hard to move through. This is when healing becomes dedication and time becomes discovery. I thought about pain. I’ve had pain. I’ve worked with pain and then it occurred to me. It came into me like a whole being awareness. The other side of pain, is pleasure. Pleasure. What a revelation! In all these years, it never occurred to me that pleasure was a root deficiency to my experience of pain. I was totally invested inside the pain that I missed out on any form of pleasure. I never embraced the joy of life and in being because I never thought to look at the other side of what the experience of pain had to offer.
I thank God for that moment in wholeness. It moved me. Pleasure was now in the game and enjoying my life became priority. When you embrace the other side, you stop brow beating the wound. You cease falling back into rigid, perfectionism disguised as discipline and the “trigger” has a place to go, a space to flourish. My personal healing did not look like the ideal or what I had anticipated. I found rest. I witnessed no more pushing into life or wanting to force forward. I could feel the grip loosen, I allowed some fun and sweeter foods, exercise was no longer a bloodbath but now conscious movement based on my needs for that day. Yes, I gained some weight but I also embraced that weight and loved myself anyway. My healing journey through pain helped me find a better balance within myself, a conscious balance. It helped me find the opening to the possibility of having pleasure move through me and integrate it into my experience. When you make your healing journey personal; it moves you, it changes you, it transforms you into a state of inner-conscious being. Shift away from the “call to action” approach to healing and move deeper into intimate understanding. Let that be the life-giving medicine you take in.
-Releasing Emotional Patterns
#BecomeYourInnerMostBeing #ConsciousBalance #WoundsAreOurGreatestTeachers
#SeektheOtherSide #BecomeWhole #WholnessMatters
AUTHOR OF INNER BEAUTY BLOGS
Jennifer is a truth seeker and artistic expressionist. She is certified energy therapist, emotional wellness coach, yoga/meditation instructor and intuitive. She is known her poetry and the deep care she feels for others.