I was alone in my room feeling overwhelmed and heavy, preoccupied with thoughts that stamped my mind with the blah's. Thoughts that made me sigh not in relief, no but gave such weight that my shoulder's wilted, my chest caved inward and my head dropped downward. I had the blues.. I wasn't happy and I started thinking, maybe I never really was. I guess anything is possible but I needed to remember a time I smiled.
- The first thought that popped into my head was my cat. My cat makes me happy! I see his little face and I just light up! After work, I'd get so excited to see him that I'd scream his name in the car, I'd say, "Lakshhhmmmmi, mommy's coming home!" as I drove up the hill to my house. I loved that little butter ball and I feel happy, loving and being loved in a safe, reciprocal way.
- The second thought came rushing forward quickly, I felt really happy pursuing my acting career. I loved being part of the whole scene, from character development to rehearsals to show time! It was exhilarating! The more I learned to let go of myself within the context of my craft, I had FUN! It makes me happy, working with creative people and building healthy camaraderie- moving deep into development and understanding.
- I thought, wow! I'm thrilled after working with someone in my healing/coaching business. I love serving people, helping people shift and heal or just holding their hand close to my heart while they cry. They cry - I cry and somehow, right underneath such pain and sadness, such depth and empathy, is a soft space of happiness. I feel happy, serving people and supporting their way back to balance, deep care, and wholeness.
- And writing.. Well, I love to write! When I put words together or create a picture, a beat, an amazing sound and rhythm, I'm captivated! My heart beats fast, my eyes widen, my body fills with emotion and I'm potent with the spirit- I'm unstoppable! It makes me happy communicating, sharing a message, a moment, being honest- vulnerable, powerful and authentically me-
Turns out, I am happy and happiness doesn't really "Hang Out" somewhere. I learned, happiness is not a destination. It's not an end point. It comes in moments, precious moments that are fleeting but can still be remembered and held onto. So, I remembered my happiness and held onto those treasured moments sprinkled through my life. I was reminded of what truly fulfills me and I remembered who I am- aside from the heavy thoughts. Once you remember that, happiness Finds You and stays awhile-
- There is a great distinction between feeling fulfilled and unfulfilled, connected and disconnected, alive and empty. This book I've been reading, talks about two principles called, mirrored and deflection. "Mirrored is to look in another's eyes and know you've been seen, to listen to another's words and know you've been heard, to feel another's touch and know you've been felt." It is a shared experience. "Deflection on the other hand, is the opposite. It is offering the gift or part of yourself to someone and having that person unwilling or unable to take it. What's clear is how deflection makes you feel in comparison. It feels as if someone is shutting the door on you." It is a disconnection. Mirroring, fulfills and creates more. Whereas, deflection disconnects and creates emptiness. Be mindful of where, what and with whom you Hang Out with, that will determine if happiness finds and fulfills you.
And if you find your too far away, just remember..
Give yourself a little R & R
Remember what truly fulfills you & Remind yourself of who you are-
Aside from the heavy thoughts.
- I invite you to give yourself a little R & R, remember what truly fulfills you and why and in doing so, remind yourself of who you are. Write it down and have fun with it!
- Beauty Notes, ©2017
Jennifer is a truth seeker and artistic expressionist. She is a published author/poet. She is a certified emotional wellness coach, certified energy therapist, yoga/meditation instructor and intuitive.