I was alone in my room feeling overwhelmed and heavy, preoccupied with thoughts that stamped my mind with the blah's. Thoughts that made me sigh not in relief, no but gave such weight that my shoulder's wilted, my chest caved inward and my head dropped downward. I had the blues.. I wasn't happy and I started thinking, maybe I never really was. I guess anything is possible but I needed to remember a time I smiled.
- The first thought that popped into my head was my cat. My cat makes me happy! I see his little face and I just light up! After work, I'd get so excited to see him that I'd scream his name in the car, I'd say, "Lakshhhmmmmi, mommy's coming home!" as I drove up the hill to my house. I loved that little butter ball and I feel happy, loving and being loved in a safe, reciprocal way.
- The second thought came rushing forward quickly, I felt really happy pursuing my acting career. I loved being part of the whole scene, from character development to rehearsals to show time! It was exhilarating! The more I learned to let go of myself within the context of my craft, I had FUN! It makes me happy, working with creative people and building healthy camaraderie- moving deep into development and understanding.
- I thought, wow! I'm thrilled after working with someone in my healing/coaching business. I love serving people, helping people shift and heal or just holding their hand close to my heart while they cry. They cry - I cry and somehow, right underneath such pain and sadness, such depth and empathy, is a soft space of happiness. I feel happy, serving people and supporting their way back to balance, deep care, and wholeness.
- And writing.. Well, I love to write! When I put words together or create a picture, a beat, an amazing sound and rhythm, I'm captivated! My heart beats fast, my eyes widen, my body fills with emotion and I'm potent with the spirit- I'm unstoppable! It makes me happy communicating, sharing a message, a moment, being honest- vulnerable, powerful and authentically me-
Turns out, I am happy and happiness doesn't really "Hang Out" somewhere. I learned, happiness is not a destination. It's not an end point. It comes in moments, precious moments that are fleeting but can still be remembered and held onto. So, I remembered my happiness and held onto those treasured moments sprinkled through my life. I was reminded of what truly fulfills me and I remembered who I am- aside from the heavy thoughts. Once you remember that, happiness Finds You and stays awhile-
- There is a great distinction between feeling fulfilled and unfulfilled, connected and disconnected, alive and empty. This book I've been reading, talks about two principles called, mirrored and deflection. "Mirrored is to look in another's eyes and know you've been seen, to listen to another's words and know you've been heard, to feel another's touch and know you've been felt." It is a shared experience. "Deflection on the other hand, is the opposite. It is offering the gift or part of yourself to someone and having that person unwilling or unable to take it. What's clear is how deflection makes you feel in comparison. It feels as if someone is shutting the door on you." It is a disconnection. Mirroring, fulfills and creates more. Whereas, deflection disconnects and creates emptiness. Be mindful of where, what and with whom you Hang Out with, that will determine if happiness finds and fulfills you.
And if you find your too far away, just remember..
Give yourself a little R & R
Remember what truly fulfills you & Remind yourself of who you are-
Aside from the heavy thoughts.
- I invite you to give yourself a little R & R, remember what truly fulfills you and why and in doing so, remind yourself of who you are. Write it down and have fun with it!
- Beauty Notes, ©2017
TIS` THE SEASON OF HEART
December can be quite a magical month and fulfilling time of year. We get a chance to embrace the spirit of holidays and witness the wonder through the eyes of children and adults alike. Tis` the season of heart, when the world steps into a place of family, togetherness, and hope. It’s an end of a year that begins an active path into giving and receiving, rooted in a coming together of values and the essence of home. The season fills the atmosphere with magic; crisp air and snow falling from sky, lights aglow on streets and in homes, long gazes into loved one’s eyes by the crackles of fire and sparks of sweet-hearts. We take care, nestling into hearty foods like soups, stews, and hot chocolate. We bundle up with sweaters, scarves, blankets and loved ones and we find ourselves surround by light, the illumination of our hopes and dreams in the stillness of love within our hearts.
The heart symbolizes life, love and the engagement in partnership. The heart never leads alone... It never beats alone... One pulse follows the other in the direction of union. A sense of union requires partnership. We learn to connect and re-connect through the heart-experience, magnified between a pair of arms that allow us to reach out and touch what we love, while, cradled and comforted between two breasts that safely hold what we feel. We are given an opportunity to feel the magic of life, connection and harmony both, individually and collectively. The season of heart reminds us in order to create a spark of life, we cannot go at it alone. We simply relate and create in a blended continuum of wholeness. The heart does not beat alone... It does not lead alone... One pulse follows the other in complete unification.
This is a time of un-veiling, re-vealing, and an un-folding of self to the inner sweetness of comfort and warmth. It’s a reminder of the mother-child experience, the inner connection and bond of unconditional love. Our very own place to rest soulfully in the wonder and awe, completely disarmed and embraced in the natural state of being. The heart leads us to a clear passage and cleansing, a shedding of old, a point to nurture life and all that we live for. It is a space given in which to surrender, to lay down a clean slate, to be re-born in concept as we celebrate into the new, calm and cradled in the mother energy, inside the season of heart.
#HeartSeason #SpiritofCalm&Comfort #MotherEnergy #CradledInHeartEnergy #TistheSeasonforMagic #HeldinLight
It’s time to get out of the “cookie cutter” version of what healing should look like and shift back into our own personal guidance and experience. Sometimes, the path to healing has us feeling off center and it’s cause for questioning but we forget, feeling off center is also for good purpose. The center balances opposing sides and reveals a place of wholeness. When the scale tips toward into the wound, the other side of balance is overlooked. The gift of wholeness is to be open and available to both sides and to integrate them into conscious balance. Your personal path to healing begins inside wholeness not in one side of experience. Let’s look at pain for example. I’ve thought about pain. Pain is real. Pain is relentless. It reveals itself through the body, not just inside it. It wants to be seen. It beckons to be heard. It tugs at you every minute of every day. Pain is restrictive, trapped in the body with no space for joy and we suffer. Pain is suffering, the physical manifestation of held in, held back, shut down and buried emotion. Your physical body can become the storehouse for ignored, unacknowledged and suppressed emotional energy. Pain is an internal broadcast system for the feelings buried inside, screaming to be heard. To be acknowledged. To be cleared. To be loved.
Every healing journey will not look the same. It’s a personal pursuit-
Have you ever sat with the inner voice of your own pain?
I have. Pain is a lot more than just what we name it. It’s a culmination of stuck emotions, blocked feelings, experiences, memories, unconscious belief systems and unhealthy patterns. Because of this, healing can be an evolution of all experience and acknowledging what exists inside you, begins the path that serves as a direction. All of it is important information to construct a very intimate healing experience. Sometimes the tendency is to give up because you don’t like what you see and it can be hard to move through. This is when healing becomes dedication and time becomes discovery. I thought about pain. I’ve had pain. I’ve worked with pain and then it occurred to me. It came into me like a whole being awareness. The other side of pain, is pleasure. Pleasure. What a revelation! In all these years, it never occurred to me that pleasure was a root deficiency to my experience of pain. I was totally invested inside the pain that I missed out on any form of pleasure. I never embraced the joy of life and in being because I never thought to look at the other side of what the experience of pain had to offer.
I thank God for that moment in wholeness. It moved me. Pleasure was now in the game and enjoying my life became priority. When you embrace the other side, you stop brow beating the wound. You cease falling back into rigid, perfectionism disguised as discipline and the “trigger” has a place to go, a space to flourish. My personal healing did not look like the ideal or what I had anticipated. I found rest. I witnessed no more pushing into life or wanting to force forward. I could feel the grip loosen, I allowed some fun and sweeter foods, exercise was no longer a bloodbath but now conscious movement based on my needs for that day. Yes, I gained some weight but I also embraced that weight and loved myself anyway. My healing journey through pain helped me find a better balance within myself, a conscious balance. It helped me find the opening to the possibility of having pleasure move through me and integrate it into my experience. When you make your healing journey personal; it moves you, it changes you, it transforms you into a state of inner-conscious being. Shift away from the “call to action” approach to healing and move deeper into intimate understanding. Let that be the life-giving medicine you take in.
-Releasing Emotional Patterns
#BecomeYourInnerMostBeing #ConsciousBalance #WoundsAreOurGreatestTeachers
#SeektheOtherSide #BecomeWhole #WholnessMatters
AUTHOR OF INNER BEAUTY BLOGS
Jennifer is a truth seeker and artistic expressionist. She is certified energy therapist, emotional wellness coach, yoga/meditation instructor and intuitive. She is known her poetry and the deep care she feels for others.