A REJECTION WOUND HAS A VOICE OF ITS OWN

10/17/2021 0 Comments

A REJECTION WOUND HAS A VOICE OF ITS OWN

"I’m not heard. I feel ignored. I’m not important. My needs go unnoticed.
I feel alone. I feel empty. Nobody likes me…"

These statements are hard to swallow but they represent the voice of rejection, the wound that aches inside the body. It speaks loud and clear through the mind and can feel as though it’s behind the scene's taunting you. It shows up as blaming, shaming, critical, judgmental self-talk and is relentless to endure. As children, we had yet to develop a discerning ability to separate a sense of self-worth from the actions modeled by others. Therefore, inadvertently, converging the dysfunctional behavior of others with a sense of personal lack, severely distorting the view of the self at a fundamental level. The experience, fractures the connection to the foundation of self and uproots the possibilities of understanding who we are. It plants an unhealthy seed inside the psyche that says something’s intrinsically wrong with the self. We begin to believe, that love is not deserved but that also, there is no love to be given. Once that seed fully blooms, it obliterates the self and corrupts any experiences to follow. That severed connection or dis-connection makes it hard to believe that we are deserving of any goodness and makes it increasingly difficult to feel whole.

I was in the beginning stages of frozen shoulder when I went for a massage. The pain was so severe, it was hard to stay present. My mind kept falling into channels of stuck energy that felt impossible to move through but I was determined. I stayed focused. I took really deep breaths. The pain was so great, I could hear myself screaming in my head. Then for a moment, a voice rose into my consciousness and through the pain, it said, “I deserve love.” The statement didn’t faze me in that moment but I repeated it in my mind. It became a silent mantra, “I deserve love, I deserve love, I deserve love…” I didn’t stop. I wouldn't stop, even through the pain, I just kept going.

Eventually, the pain did subside and I was able to tolerate the massage more. Then, I thought about the message. I took it literal, “through the pain, I deserve love.” I thought, the pain I feel deserves love… The pain deserves love… Pain deserves love. If I can accept what’s there, then I can give myself what I need to feel better. I relaxed deeper into the massage, into the message, into myself than the voice came back, but this time, I heard something different. It said, “I deserve TO BE loved.” That I, the person, the self, deserves to be loved. To be loved. Be Loved. Beloved. I’m the beloved. Love is inherent in me.

The messages were so powerful that I got the sense they were the key to unlocking the healing potentials of the rejection wound. I realized these statements were not separate, they were connected and they weren’t just for me, but for the world. They are the missing links that establish a new connection, a self-connection. That the experience of pain separates us from the experience of love. It disconnects us from the whole and what we deserve. Once you get that, the magic happens. A new foundation anchors in the sense of self and you reclaim your worth, you take back your innocence, and that emptiness inside starts to fill with love. All those disconnected parts start to link back differently, into a state of wholeness. It's Acceptance and Love that heal the wound of rejection.

Love,
Jennifer
InBeauty Blog, Tiny Poet, 10.18.2021
- Emotional Wellness/Wisdom Coaching:
https://www.jennifersmusing.com/emotional-wellness--wisdom-coaching1.html

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TIS` THE SEASON OF HEART

December can be a magical month for some and a fulfilling time of year. We get a chance to embrace the spirit of sharing, celebrating, and witnessing a sense of wonder and joy through the eyes of children and adults alike. Tis the season of heart, when the world steps into a place of family, togetherness, and hope. It’s an end of a year that begins an active path of giving and receiving, rooted in a coming together of values and the essence of home. The holiday season fills the atmosphere with magic. The air is crisp and clean, the sun glistens off streets by day and lights aglow in homes by night. There is a sense of warmth, deep nourishment, and care as we nestle into hearty foods like soups, stews, and hot chocolate or bundle up with sweaters, scarves, blankets and loved ones surrounded by light, hope, and the stillness of love in the air and within our hearts.

The heart is full of life and love. It represents engagement in partnership and never leads alone... It never beats alone... One pulse follows the other and always in the direction of union which requires partnership. We learn to connect and re-connect through heart-experience, and this is magnified between a pair of arms that allow us to reach out and touch what we love all the while, cradled and comforted between two breasts that safely hold everything that we feel. We are given the opportunity to feel the magic of life, connection, and harmony both individually and collectively. The season of heart reminds us to create a spark of life and that we cannot go about doing that alone. It is about togetherness. It is about sharing. It is about giving and receiving. It is all about the ways of the heart. We simply relate and create in a blended continuum of wholeness. The heart does not beat alone... It does not lead alone... One pulse follows the other in complete unification.

This is a time of un-veiling, re-vealing, and an un-folding of the self into the inner sweetness of comfort and warmth. It’s a reminder of the mother-child experience, the inner connection and bond of unconditional love. Our very own place to rest and rejuvenation through celebration and creation, completely disarmed and fully embraced in the natural state of being. Let the heart lead you toward a clear passage and cleansing, a shedding of the old self. Let the heart guide you in nurturing your life and all that you live for. Let the heart take you in and give you the space to surrender on a clean slate, to be reborn in conception as you grow into the new, calm and cradled in the Divine feminine, inside the season of heart.

Love,
Jennifer
#HeartSeason #SpiritofCalm&Comfort #MotherEnergy #CradledInHeartEnergy #TistheSeasonforMagic #HeldinLight

CONSCIOUS BALANCE

It’s time to get out of the “cookie cutter” version of what healing should look like and shift back into our own personal experience and guidance. Sometimes, the path to healing can feel off balancing and can cause concern. We forget that being off balance is also for good purpose in defining it. The act of balance looks to the center of opposing forces to reveal a place of wholeness. This is the path to healing. The gift in that is in being open and available to both sides to integrate them as a point of conscious balance.

Let’s look at pain for example. Pain is real. It’s relentless. It reveals itself through the body. It wants to be seen. It beckons to be heard. It tugs at you every minute of every day. Pain is restrictive, trapped in the body with no space and we suffer. Pain is suffering, the physical manifestation of being held in, held back, shut down and buried within your own emotions. Your physical becomes the storehouse for emotional energy that has been ignored, unacknowledged and suppressed. Pain is a barometer, an internal broadcast system for the feelings buried inside, screaming to be heard. To be acknowledged. To be cleared. To be loved.

Every healing journey will not look the same. It’s a personal pursuit-

Have you ever sat with the inner voice of your own pain? I have and it had a lot to say. Pain is a lot more than just the name we gave. It’s the culmination of stuck emotions, blocked feelings, experiences, memories, unconscious belief systems and because of this, pain can be the source of evolution. Acknowledging what exists inside you, begins the path that serves as a healing direction. All of it is important information. Sometimes, the tendency is to give up because we don’t like what we see and it can be hard to move through. This is when healing becomes dedication and time invested becomes discovery. I’ve thought about pain. I’ve been in pain. I’ve worked through and with pain. It occurred to me, like a whole being awareness that the other side of pain, is pleasure. What a revelation! It never occurred to me that pleasure could be a root deficiency to the experience of pain. I was totally invested inside the pain that I missed out on any form of pleasure. I thank God for that moment in wholeness. Pleasure was now part of understanding personal balance and became a priority.

When we embrace the other side, pain can rest. We cease falling back into rigid, perfectionism disguised as discipline and the “trigger” has a place to go, a space to flourish. My personal healing did not look ideal or what I had anticipated. I found rest. There was no more pushing or forcing life forward. The grip was loosening and I took in some fun, sweeter foods, conscious movement based on my needs rather than any “should’s.” My healing journey through pain helped me find a better balance within myself, a conscious balance. When you make your healing journey personal, it moves you, changes you, transforms you. Shift away from the “call to action” approach to healing and move deeper into intimate understanding. Let that be the life-giving medicine you need.

Love,
Jennifer🌸
Gentle Touch Healing
Healing through Compassion
- Inner Beauty Blog, Conscious Balance, Tiny Poet, 4.19.2024

AUTHOR OF INNER BEAUTY BLOGS

Jennifer is a truth seeker and artistic expressionist. She is certified energy therapist, emotional wellness coach, yoga/meditation instructor and intuitive. She is known her poetry and the deep care she feels for others.

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